Friday, 17 August 2007
First off, apologies to anyone who's read this stuff already on my myspace music page, and is slightly miffed not to find anything remotely new or even cunningly edited (bar this intro post) to increase the humour value (no matter how low it was to start with)...sorry. Then again, think of the number of "Greatest Hits" albums you've bought with "New Bonus Tracks!!" stuck on the end, rushed home to listen to your musical heroes' (or heroines') latest creative offerings, only to realise these new studio efforts' only reason for existing is to demonstrate:
a) just how great their music used to be, and
b) contrary to the title of the (unfathomably-popular) song by The Verve, the drugs really do work, usually extremely effectively. Only they don't make you any better at playing the guitar, singing, being a coherent human being, etc, once you've been ingesting them on a scale only made possible by regular royalty-cheques, and for the number of years necessary for those royalties to start to dry up...hence the need for a new "Greatest Hits" collection, and the demands from the record company accountants for some fresh meat - no matter how antibiotic-ridden, pumped-full of water to give an illusion of mass, and wastefully over-packaged it might be. Ah, 'tis a messy business, being a rock superstar!
Mind you, never having seen a royalty cheque in my life, I have no idea what hedonistic excesses I might have indulged in if I'd had a few thousand of the buggers...actually, knowing me, probably painfully few. :-)
Well, anyway, I hope someone out there finds something they like in these posts, and I'll finish by stating that every claimed fact, every historical incident & detail, is as honest & true as I could possibly let them be. The odd town / gig venue / person's name might have had to be changed here and there in the best interests of my ongoing personal health, oh, sorry, I mean avoiding lawsuits, but unlike most of the media I'll make it obvious when I'm modifying events (aka lying my arse off).
And yes, I'm addicted to parentheses. I thought I could quit...
p.s. this is all my friend Martin's fault - it was his idea that I should try to inflict my ramblings further on the world, so you can blame him :-)